Lemonaide??? Not a Chance......

When life gives you lemons, grab a few and chuck them at innocent passers-by so they can have a lemon filled day just like you. Aim for the good spots (e.g. head, crotch, face) and cause as much bruising as possible. If they don’t pick up the lemons themselves, go do it and throw them again and keep at it until they are too soft and gushed up to throw well any longer.

Language Peeves

As Americans, the gross majority of us speak only one language. I include myself in this bucket, however, I do my level best to speak (and write) this language well, and just as importantly, with character, unlike what appears to be so many of my fellow Americans. Following is a list of some very common American English language screw-ups that set my teeth on edge.

•  A mute point (stop talking already you are just proving how stupid you are)
• Something more stronger (um…)
• My friend and me (ah, the pesky use of pronouns)
• Me and my friend will (more wrong than the one above, as if there are gradients of wrong)
• Will you take my friend and I to… (nope, nice try, thank-you for playing)
•  I could care less (well I couldn’t)
•  Needless-to-say (then don’t)
• I ain't got no (I don't have any either) 
• I seen it (you either see it, or have seen it, take your pick; or maybe you saw it)

Maybe I have an unfair advantage? I actually took and passed English in school, including my senior year in HS taught by my dad. And, I actually have a feel for the language when I write, to the point that I am comfortable breaking that “never break” rule of starting a sentence with the word “and.” After all it is a writer’s prerogative to break the rules occasionally in favor of style (or should I say in favor of flavor), as long as he has also shown he knows which rules not to break when playing it straight. 

Got some that bug you? Love to hear them. (Yes those are incomplete sentences, see note on style above).

I'm Baaaaaack

How ‘bout them …….. Nope.

Did you see tha ……. Nope.

Can you believe how ……. Nope.

I am not going to go there, not today.

Oh dear blogosphere, I have been negligent in my postings of late, flat on my ass. No excuses, no explanations, just didn’t write or post. Am I going to try to get back at this? Yes. Am I going to get back to posting every day? Probably not.

One of the things I have committed to myself is to try to keep this blog full of positive themes, humor, and fun. Well, that is part of the issue with posting every day, I do not always have something along those veins to write about. I think this cold dark winter in Canada away from all my friends and especially my sons is taking a toll on my life outlook and finding the positive in the day is a struggle right now. BUT, as I said, that is NOT the type of blog I want this to be, at all, any longer. So I will endeavor to bring my happy face, put on my humor hat, and type out some fun.

Shall we begin?

Nope…….not today.

Instead, dear reader, take the next five minutes, close your eyes, and clear your mind of the sludge of today. You had time budgeted for reading this, and I am redirecting you. Get away from the tech of the day, maybe snuggle up with your cat or dog or lover (your choice), close your eyes and just let your mind go. Let the stress of the day, the eye strain of the computer, the back strain of the crappy desk chair, all go by the wayside and just exist. ENJOY!! Ready…….BEGIN.